Leveson: The Musical

I can't be the only one thinking that the grand finale of the Leveson Inquiry would have been better if it had featured jazz hands?

A little number for the witnesses (well, some of them), to the tune of the list of colours in Joseph's Coat from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. 

It was Brooks and Murdoch and Grant and Hunt 

And Coulson and Blair and Cameron and Piers 

And Riddell and Johnson and Watson and Marr 

And Mohan and Yates and Rowling and Gove 

And Clarke and Campbell and Osborne and Ed 

And Harman and Salmond and Prescott and Clarke 

And Coogan and Black and Hughes and Gordon 

And Snow and Hardgreaves and Crone and Straw

And Barber and Clegg and Boulton and Leigh

And Thomas and Hislop and Harding and Cave

And Major and Bowe and Mandelson and Crown 

And Wright and Blackhurt and Turner and Fox 

And Paxman and Diamond and Morgan and Grade

And Brady and Wright and Quick and James 

And Jay!

And of course a number for Leveson and Jay, to the tune of the Muppet theme song:

It’s time to fine the papers,

It’s time to jail some hacks,

It’s time to tell the journos they’re not getting any slack.

It’s time for us to publish;
It’s time for our report;

It’s time to raise the curtain on the answers we have sought.

Why did we need to do this?

Our press was being bad;

Corruption and phone hacking 

Which made the public mad.

So we ran an inquiry 

Witnesses from far and wide
To testify before us

On the most sensational

Expo-sational

Scandal-ational

Murdoch-ational

This is what we call The Leveson Show!